Hey Iran, About Those Three Kids You Captured...

... You Can Keep Them
August 6th, 2009
I’ve been watching this story about the three Americans who “accidentally” hiked into Iran and managed to get themselves snagged by the Mullah authorities....
WASHINGTON — The United States said Friday it was investigating reports that three Americans have been abducted in northern Iraq.
“Embassy Baghdad is aware of the reports and is investigating,” State Department deputy spokesman Robert Wood said, referring to reports he said were on Al-Jazeera Television, an Arab satellite station based in Qatar.
My bride’s initial reaction was something akin to “What the hell were these dumbasses thinking?” Me, being indeed a Crotchety Old Bastard couldn’t help but suspect something more substantial than routine dumb-assery.
So, let’s take a little closer look at our gang of unfortunate and totally innocent “hikers”.
First we have Shane Bauer. Shane has a degree in “Peace and Conflict Studies” from…you guessed it…Berkley. He also has solid bona fides in the far left media world having written for The Nation and reported for the always pro-American Al Jazeera. Oh and lest I be negligent, I must point out that he speaks fluent Arabic and lives in “drumroll please” Damascus, Syria.
Next we have Sarah Shourd. Sarah is also a product of the ever progressive California education system. Her writing is so unhinged anti-Israel that it lends one to suspect that she is not in captivity at all but interviewing to be the mouth piece for Mookie I’m-A-Dinner-Jacket. Interestingly she also resides in Damascus, Syria.
Lastly we have Joshua Fattal whose father hails from Iraq. While our first two “hikers” seem to be your garden variety far left, anti-Israeli, terrorist sympathizers, Mr. Fattal is a true free thinking enviro-wacko.
Josh lives at the Aprovecho Research Center in Cottage Grove, Oregon which is little more than a government subsidized hippie commune. He holds a degree in Environmental Economics and Policy and is probably totally down with Obama’s Regulatory Czar who thinks it would be a grand idea if pigs and cows could sue people and actually be in court.
These three individuals are never going to be productive Americans so I say the Mullahs should keep them.
Now I’m not saying it’s okay for the Iranian Army to run about kidnapping Americans but if Nancy Pelosi and Harry Reid want to go “hiking”, I some suggested places to do it.